self-care_in_times_of_psychological_distress
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- | **NURTURE YOUR BODY**, don’t let it down or put extra stress on it by neglecting your “vitals”. Make sure you get what you need in water, nutrients, sleep, rest / activity. Don’t tire your system more with junk food, excitants, alcohol. Re-install regular cycles for eating, sleeping… Wash. Change clothes. Get some fresh air and light. Get a massage. Use your senses, smell good smells, listen to good sounds. Get moving if you’ve only been resting, get some rest if you’ve only been running. If possible, don’t drop out of your favorite sport or hobby; that is of course, assuming you are eating, drinking water, sleeping, and that you have no injuries or disease (otherwise, physical activities might actually be harmful). In any case, don’t overdo it, your body is probably weaker. Also, in times of adversity, certain holistic disciplines (like yoga or others), practiced safely and softly, can reveal their core-lessons: | + | ==== NURTURE YOUR BODY ==== |
- | **BE WISE ABOUT (FURTHER) ALTERING YOUR STATE OF CONSCIOUSNESS** | + | Don’t let it down or put extra stress on it by neglecting your “vitals”. Make sure you get what you need in water, nutrients, sleep, rest / activity. Don’t tire your system |
- | **IDENTIFY AND STOP SELF HARM.** You are aching. You are vulnerable. With vicious logic, you might engage in behaviors that will, more or less directly and quickly, lead to more harm to yourself. Like what ? Like intoxicating yourself, not eating, over-eating, | + | ==== BE WISE ABOUT (FURTHER) ALTERING YOUR STATE OF CONSCIOUSNESS ==== |
- | **COME OUT about your psychological distress.** Say how you are feeling, what your are going through, to your family | + | Consider strong |
- | **CAREFUL WITH THAT EXTRA LOAD OF WORK / DECLINE MORE RESPONSABILITIES ?** Note -and make others note- that if you are not well, it could be irresponsible on your part to accept more responsabilities, | + | ==== IDENTIFY AND STOP SELF HARM ==== |
- | **ACCEPT GENUINE HELP** from others, whether your know them well or not, when it comes your way. It can be that someone you didn’t think cared about you proposes | + | You are aching. You are vulnerable. With vicious logic, you might engage in behaviors that will, more or less directly and quickly, lead to more harm to yourself. Like what ? Like intoxicating yourself, not eating, over-eating, over spending, betting, taking stupid risks, cutting yourself, punching doors, being aggressive towards strangers, driving fast, not wearing |
- | **ACCEPT THAT HELP MIGHT NOT COME FROM WHERE YOU THOUGHT IT WOULD.** We are all different, and all striving at times not to lose it. Your intense state of distress might be to hard to deal with for some, who will tend to protect themselves from it. And maybe they should, so respect that. Let them be, let go of any resentment or disappointment. Who knows, they might start providing help at other stages of the sometime long process of psychological recovery, they might help in ways you don’t recognize yet, they might not help at all. You’ll see if you can catch up with them later. DO KICK them out of your life, though, very far, if they start attacking you, being nasty or clearly disrespectful to you (see below “avoid toxic people”). | + | ==== COME OUT about your psychological distress ==== |
+ | |||
+ | Say how you are feeling, what your are going through, to your family and/or friends and/or co-workers, without ambiguity, in your own simple words, without minimizing nor exaggerating. You need not go into details, certainly not with everyone. What you want is to make sure that the persons around you and/or whom you trust, become aware that your condition is serious and that you are engaging in a process of taking extra care of yourself. If they are smart and they care about you, from then on they will not take you on crazy binge-drinking sessions on saturday nights, or drop pills down your throat screaming “you gonna be oookaay “. They will not say “I hear you”, then hand you a ten tons file to work on over the weekend. If they still do that after you’ve told them how you are, they might be ignorant/ | ||
+ | |||
+ | ==== CAREFUL WITH THAT EXTRA LOAD OF WORK / DECLINE MORE RESPONSABILITIES ? ==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | Note -and make others note- that if you are not well, it could be irresponsible on your part to accept more responsabilities, | ||
+ | |||
+ | ==== ACCEPT GENUINE HELP ==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | from others, whether your know them well or not, when it comes your way. It can be that someone you didn’t think cared about you proposes to drive you somewhere you need to go. It can be a smile or a conversation with a stranger. Something warm, simple, gently destined to you. How do you know if a helping gesture is genuine and good for you ? You feel it, mostly. Of course it has a certain consistency with observable facts. As for feeling, you should feel more free, a little more alive, when you accept/ | ||
+ | |||
+ | ==== ACCEPT THAT HELP MIGHT NOT COME FROM WHERE YOU THOUGHT IT WOULD ==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | We are all different, and all striving at times not to lose it. Your intense state of distress might be to hard to deal with for some, who will tend to protect themselves from it. And maybe they should, so respect that. Let them be, let go of any resentment or disappointment. Who knows, they might start providing help at other stages of the sometime long process of psychological recovery, they might help in ways you don’t recognize yet, they might not help at all. You’ll see if you can catch up with them later. DO KICK them out of your life, though, very far, if they start attacking you, being nasty or clearly disrespectful to you (see below “avoid toxic people”). | ||
Know that when you start REDEFINING yourself, for example through therapy or even self-care, it is not unusual that your relationships, | Know that when you start REDEFINING yourself, for example through therapy or even self-care, it is not unusual that your relationships, | ||
- | **SEEK GOOD COMPANY** especially if being alone makes you more at risk of neglecting/ | + | ==== SEEK GOOD COMPANY |
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+ | especially if being alone makes you more at risk of neglecting/ | ||
+ | |||
+ | ==== AVOID TOXIC PEOPLE ==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | I have already mentioned above the full-on savior-invader with fucked-up personal life, well, that’s one type of toxic people. There are plenty. They feed on you, they parasite or pollute you, they irritate, manipulate, exhaust or confuse you, or they make you feel like shit when you’re trying to feel better. Generally, you recognize that someone is kind of toxic to you when you feel somehow worse after they’ve “helped” you or after you’ve been with them than before. And maybe they, on the contrary, strangely look all pumped up, kind of invigorated, | ||
+ | |||
+ | ==== IMPROVE / CARE FOR YOUR IMMEDIATE SURROUNDINGS/ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Keep or make a clean, tidy home. Take the trash out. Open the windows once in a while, let light and air in. Have distinct spaces for distinct activities, if possible (if not possible, you can invent some sort of code/ritual to transition between space/ | ||
+ | |||
+ | ==== PROJECT YOURSELF, VISUALIZE, VALUE LIFE ==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | You like what you do ? If you don’t like what you’re doing with your life well then, no wonder you are distressed… Maybe it should be the first thing you consider changing ?! But let’s assume you really like what you do, and maybe that you are even very good at it, and maybe that you know it is very important for others – You want to be able to keep doing it, right ? As best as possible ? Is that very clear to you ? I repeat, is that very clear to you ? | ||
- | **AVOID TOXIC PEOPLE.** | + | ==== BE COURAGEOUS ! ==== |
- | I have already mentionned above the full-on savior-invader with fucked-up personal life, well, that’s one type of toxic people. There are plenty. They feed on you, they parasite or pollute you, they irritate, manipulate, exhaust or confuse you, or they make you feel like shit when you’re trying to feel better. Generally, you recognize that someone is kind of toxic to you when you feel somehow worse after they’ve “helped” you or after you’ve been with them than before. And maybe they, on the contrary, strangely look all pumped up, kind of invigorated, | + | |
- | **IMPROVE / CARE FOR YOUR IMMEDIATE SURROUNDINGS/ | + | Yes, it takes a load of courage, patience and dedication to get oneself through |
- | **PROJECT YOURSELF, VISUALIZE, VALUE LIFE.** You like what you do ? If you don’t like what you’re doing with your life well then, no wonder you are distressed… Maybe it should be the first thing you consider changing ?! But let’s assume you really like what you do, and maybe that you are even very good at it, and maybe that you know it is very important for others – You want to be able to keep doing it, right ? As best as possible ? Is that very clear to you ? I repeat, is that very clear to you ? | ||
- | **BE COURAGEOUS !** Yes, it takes a load of courage, patience and dedication to get oneself through a crisis, and grow from it. And your own demons and weaknesses can be real hard to face. But guess what, once you start doing that, caring for yourself, you will have plenty more energy free to fight other fights. You will become able to help others better, and maybe in more ways, both simple and sophisticated ways. Remember : COURAGE IS CONTAGIOUS. Help yourself, help others. | ||
//Written by Emily, May 2014 | //Written by Emily, May 2014 | ||
(Reviewed by Philomene)// | (Reviewed by Philomene)// | ||
self-care_in_times_of_psychological_distress.txt · Last modified: 2016/03/02 10:58 by emily